4:02 AM

Sometimes I wonder what I was thinking when I decided to take a job in Emergency Nursing. It most definitely is not glamorous and most of the time I just genuinely don't like my patients. This is mostly because it is a population that for one reason or another refuses by choice not to take care of themselves. For example, if you are taking a seizure medication, is it really a good idea to smoke "spice?" uh... I think not. It's frustrating as a nurse who wants to help people actually get better when patients seem to knowingly harm themselves. What it ends up being is that a patient's health is truly in their hands. My reason for writing this is that a few nights ago, I had the worst concoction of patients imaginable from drug seeking doctor shoppers to psych patients I spent a good 30 minutes attempting to understand. I understand that a lot of the problems in the world are "no one's fault." But I think at some point every person needs to take responsibility for the hand that they have been dealt. I probably should have had a better attitude towards the patients I cared for, but it's hard when you see them making poor choices that ultimately lead them down a path they probably don't want to be headed. I guess what I need to realize is that it is not my fault the poor choices people make and with the short amount of time (okay, so maybe 9 hours isn't all that short but in comparison) I have to spend with them, it's impossible to change a lifetime of life-destroying bad habits.